Moscow State Circus

So.

College is over. The end of an era.

Ate too much choc and cake on thursday, went to the most POINTLESS sociology lesson ever, and witnessed two guys lying on top of a car outside the Jolly Farmer and getting squished. Well, not quite.

I hope they are not dead though.

Went to Moscow State Circus in Southsea last night (NOT in Swansea.. which is where I told Adam it was!!)

I wasn't really sure what to expect. My only memories of circuses is one we went to in France yonks ago (and the only thing I remember about it is that I lost one of my beanie babies!!) and the film 'Dumbo.'

I was secretly hoping for some big-eared elephants but I don't think RSPCA would allow that. Animal abuse and all tha'.

But it was actually really good! My dad got free tickets from work, enough so that I could go with both parents and bring Adam and my brother could bring a friend too (I KICKED HIS ASS AT ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS!! YAYY!) and so even if the show was rubbish, we wouldn't have lost much. Apart from petrol costs. :)

BUT THE SHOW WAS AWESOME.

I don't know any technical circus names, but there was a lot of scary spin-y, high-up, jump-y, dangerous-looking, juggling, knife-throwing, people - catching stuff which is hard to explain if you were not there.

There was one point where this guy was running on this wheel thing which was up VERY high and he kept looking like he was going to fall off. then he started SKIPPING whilst running on this thing. I CANNOT EXPLAIN IT. BUT IT WAS AWESOME.

There was a clown-y person who had a little weird chum and they would fill in with some random stuff (like tight-rope walkinggg, eek!) whilst all the scary technical stuff was set up. I think I have developed a crush on him, in a kind of Adrien-Brody way. nom.

Also, throughout the whole show there was this weird Rasputin narrative which would go ON and ON. Deep, booming, Russian voice rambling about Rasputin when I WANTED PEOPLE TO HURRY UP AND NEARLY-DIE.

So yeah, although I missed out on a Woods rave at Chez Overstall, the circus more than made up for it :) I didn't really think that it would be my sort of thing, but it was really good.

Shame about the annoying people shaking their charity buckets about. And the annoying lighting-up things that every child seemed to have in the audience. haha.

Oooh. I have decided that I want to be a man.

Haha.

The end.

Goodbye.

I won't explain.

I will leave you wondering: 'Why does Jennie want to be a man? I am intrigued. I will ask her next time I see her. For her birthday I will buy her a penis.'

OK.

I will explain.

MEN NEVER HAVE TO EFFING QUEUE TO GO TO THE TOILET.

WHY DO ALL WOMEN SEEM TO NEED THE TOILET AT THE SAME TIME?

WHY CAN MEN POOTLE IN, HAVE A WHIZZ AND THEN STRIDE OUT, WHEREAS WOMEN HAVE TO STAND IN THEIR LINE, WRIGGLING ABOUT, CLENCHING THEIR BUTT MUSCLES.

I am sorry for the crude-ness. But it gets on my nerves. Women are silly.

Why can't women have more toilets provided for them? Men can subtlely wee in a bush, whilst pretending they are enjoying the view!

Anyways. Rant over. LOL.

Good day. Hope everyone has a fun half term :)

I LOVE MY JOB

Haha,

just got back from an awesome shift at work.

everyone was happy and i was on TILLS which is awesome.

and the shop wasn't too busy so we could mess about lots :)

and we had the nice manager.

but the funn-est thing was hanging around tills (but with no customers)

Me, chris and sam had fun playing with castanets and clip-on hair extensions.

Then we had a funny convo about pouffes (you know, those foot stool things... kinda bean-baggy?)

Chris : I want to buy a pouffe, they are half price.

Jen: IT LOOKS SO COMFY.

Chris: 'Tis! I like it when you sit on them and they are not too sink-y

Sam: But that pouffe looks really HARD.

Chris: I like it HARD.

Jen: ....

Sam: HAHAHAHAHHAHA

Jen: .......... ohhhh.

Chris: There's no point having a squishy one, they are no good.

Then they started making fun of me for being young.

Basically, Matalan can be boring at times but I work with a fabbb bunch of people.

I miss my superdruggies though (except maybe Podge, haha!) :P

but yeah. Wouldnt want to work at Nalatam full-time tbh.

Just finished watching Junior apprentice, glad that Jordan douche has gone.

I gave Nick permission to use the word DOUCHE when referring to Jordan.

I do not normally like that word. But it seemed appropriate.

Life is nice.

Exams are not.

Funny Joke.

I found this joke in a magazine and it made me laugh :)

Its a little rude though, so watch out!!

A convict breaks into a house to look for money, and inside finds a couple in bed.

He orders the guy out and ties him to a chair.

While tying the wife to the bed, the convict gets on top of her, kisses her neck, and then gets up to go to the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband whispers over to his wife:

'Listen, this guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He's probably spent a long time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don' complain... do whatever he tells you. This guy is obviously very dangerous If he gets angry, he'll kill us both. Be strong honey, I love you.'

His wife responds:

'He wasn't kissing my neck, he was whispering in my ear. He told me he's gay, thinks your cute and asked if we had some Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey, I love you too.'

If any of you do not understand that joke (I admit, it took me a few mins to get it!!) then you are very innocent-minded :)

In other news, people are voting today. Not me, I want it to be over. My sociology teacher wants us to stay up for the results. He THEN decided to tell us that the counting may not be finished until 4am. NO THANKS, guv'na!

P.S I spent 45mins watching this weeks Doctor who.

I want that 45mins BACKKKKKKKK.

The ginger assistant is annoying and something about Matt Smith really bugs me.

GAH.

'I'm going to cast my vote for whoever offers free driving lessons to people whose names begin with 'J' :)

The election is coming up, and with all the hype about it I feel tired.

I can't even vote yet but I don't think I realised how CRAZY MPs go with campaigns. I think thats because when Brown was first our PM I didn't really care much, as long as he didn't abolish The Simpsons. :D

Everyone's talking about it, and I KNOW that in our democratic society it's important that we know all the facts before we vote. But we need an Obama. If I was going to vote I would have no idea. Should I just follow the crowd and vote for Cleggy, because he is about 10000% more attractive than the others?

I don't know. As an August baby, I am a bit gutted that I cannot vote basically. I have watched 2 of the 3 TV debates and now I was to REP ENGLAND and contribute to the success of one of the leaders. I am rambling. Slow news day, I guess.

On the way to Southampton yesterday, I was on a bus when we went past a man on the side of the road holding up a cardboard sign with 'LONDON' written on it. I have never seen that before, except from homeless people in movies. It made me think about whether I would ever be willing to pick up a hitchhiker, even if I WAS heading to london. If I was in his situation (whatever that situation might be) I would begrudge everyone who drove past unashamedly.

Any good samaritans?

But if I was in the drivers seat (literally) would I pick up a stranger?

He looked foreign, so he was OBVIOUSLY a terrorist/ illegal immigrant/ gypsy/ some one who will kill or eat my children.

There would be some hitchhikers (MOST!) who have good intentions. They want to go to London but can't afford train fare (it IS quite a lot) but would you be willing to spend an hour in the car with someone you didn't know, who maybe doesn't speak your language, even if it WAS for a good deed?

It would be nice to hear what people think, I cannot decide!!

In sociology workshop today my teacher freaked out because he saw a rat near the entrance to Ashurst. It was a BIG rat but I wasn't too grossed out. I have seen RATATOUILLE. All rats are friendly and just want to cook :)

Good times.

Life is nice.

I have been in a good mood for a while now :)

Like, no stress.

Which is nice :)

Walking to work today I just said 'Morning' to everyone I saw. Which I never normally do.

I feel that because I started my revision quite early on, I don't have so much pressure. Last year I rushed it and got really stressed. This year I am going to less workshops (only SLIGHTLY less) and giving myself time to just chill, and watch Waterloo Road and Glee :)

So I am cool, calm and collected.

Except my bum chum Sarah at work referred to my hairband as 'gay.'

Got an OK-ish weekend planned.

Babysitting tonight, Work tomorrow and then LESBIAN LOVIN' on sunday with Katy and Becky :) I have told them that I will bring lube, vibes and condoms.

Nice fact for you. Apparently you can buy condoms in Amsterdam which are the shape of Big Ben...

I learn so much in sociology :)

Hope everyone has a nice weekend x x